Gabrielle that is such a normal reaction and thank you for being honest, and raw about it, I don’t know how many reviews you’ve had but I wonder if those 2 were around 1% of the total and another way to look at it? Xx
Thank you for being vulnerable! I love how aware you are about what's going on in your body. I am not very fond of reviews, it is so subjective if someone likes something or not. If you put vegetables for sale on amazon and rated them I'm sure something like Brussels sprouts would get awful reviews but some really love them. And it depends on how to cook them. With books that are supposed to help and uplift a lot of people think it is a magic potion which works like a drug, so they are disappointed that it didn't work when they put no effort in. People rate all kinds of weird things. I once saw a restaurant review where someone said that they didn't like the restaurant as their child was throwing things at someone else and that person then got very rude and the restaurant staff didn't help. I mean, really? 🤣 I think the people who will really need the book will be found by the book and for them it will be gold. ❤️ Keep shining! Have a wonderful weekend!
Thanks so much for your thoughtful comment, Sadhbh. I agree reviews and ratings and opinions are entirely subjective and so often we don’t even know what’s going on behind the scenes that may have prompted that particular response - it may not actually be about the thing they’re rating or reviewing! 😊
I LOVE your book! Your people will love your book! I had someone email to tell me my content was bewildering and disappointing this week and they were unsubscribing. I cried and got really angry then I apologised and I’m still working it all out.
Thank you, Claire, I should have said I was digging for compliments or reassurance! 😘 Criticism is tough, right? Big hugs to you for that gut response. I’m curious, do you think you had done something you needed to apologise for? x
Yep, taught responses run deep. And yep, so often harsh, unjustified judgments aren’t about the thing being judged, or us, it’s about the person doing the judging and what’s going on with them x
Right - so my husband was here when I read the email so he got the full reaction - for the first time I felt anger when I read it - like how dare you write me an email like that and also then shame that I hadn't done enough to help him/ keep him happy - so it's an uplevel but still work to do - this person is a colleague so feels even harder - like what on earth did I do?!/ not do to warrant that but it's not about me is it? People told me the internet was like this which I kind of got prepped for but not from a colleague... I wasn't expecting it to come in via that route...
Oof, that’s an added layer. How we communicate criticism is as important as, and can say more than, the criticism itself. Taking time to process your own reaction and to figure out how (or if) you want to respond is needed x
Your honestly here is so wonderful to read, thank you. And thank you for sharing your reaction to the reviews too - it really helped me to understand some of the reactions I feel in my body when I put stuff "out there". Oh...and I left a review too 🩷🩷
Oh you fabulous human, thank you! 😘 Any time I share something that feels a bit vulnerable or doesn’t seem much talked about (I only ever share what I’m happy to) I always know that there will be someone who feels or has felt the same way. Always. But if we don’t talk about the ick feelings we think we’re alone in experiencing them which is just not true. This has been my approach from the very start - I began writing blog posts and created my first course because I was sure there were others out there who struggled the same way I did x
I totally relate to this feeling. I hardly ever read my reviews. Learned it very early on from Seth Godin who also doesn’t read his. You’d never write anything again if you kept reading them. But last year, like you, I noticed on Goodreads when someone broke the chain of five and four-star reviews with a dodge review that showed they basically hadn’t read the book. I initially felt enraged and wounded, and then I remembered why I don’t read reviews. I always remind myself that criticism is just feedback, not a court order to do what the person says or cancel your writing career and not always useful.
Most people don’t know their arse from their elbows when it comes to leaving reviews. Moaning about, for instance, the Amazon delivery driver leaving your parcel on the step or how you got the shits from eating at a restaurant down the road from the hotel when reviewing a book or a hotel only exposes high-level buffoonery.
Thanks so much for sharing your experience and perspective, Nat. Yes to feedback not a court order, and high-level buffoonery will keep me chuckling for a while 😄x
Thank you for putting this out there and being comfortable with feeling vulnerable. It makes others feel less alone. Thank you for a mention of my book. I’m checking yours out now. Stay human. Nx
Thank you for sharing this, Gabrielle! I am waiting for my second book to come out, and today I finally published my post about processing the 1* review that I have received (just one in a sea of 4/5* reviews!). I'm a recovering perfectionist and people pleaser too, and felt very seen in your words here. Thank you for the timely reminder!
Feeling seen, heard, recognising ourselves in others is so valuable, it's why we do this, right? Your second book – what an amazing achievement, Clare, huge congratulations! I do wonder why people bother to write one star reviews, if you don't like the thing why not just move on? They sure do take some processing and I'm celebrating that you have a sea of four and five star reviews! Also, I have my finished Trust the Process embroidery hoop on the wall in my study and I LOVE it x
Yes, absolutely! Thank you so much, Gabrielle - it really came at the right time for me reading your words here, and I'm so grateful to you for sharing. I wonder that too, especially when books are on preorder. If you hate it that much then just get on with your life! Oh that's wonderful, I'm so happy that you love it ❤️ those words definitely keep me going and I hope it bring your strength, joy and inspiration to see it on your wall! xx
Gabrielle that is such a normal reaction and thank you for being honest, and raw about it, I don’t know how many reviews you’ve had but I wonder if those 2 were around 1% of the total and another way to look at it? Xx
Love how you’re getting it back on brand! 😂 Normalising our reactions and feelings is so important, it’s why I share this stuff 😊
Thank you for being vulnerable! I love how aware you are about what's going on in your body. I am not very fond of reviews, it is so subjective if someone likes something or not. If you put vegetables for sale on amazon and rated them I'm sure something like Brussels sprouts would get awful reviews but some really love them. And it depends on how to cook them. With books that are supposed to help and uplift a lot of people think it is a magic potion which works like a drug, so they are disappointed that it didn't work when they put no effort in. People rate all kinds of weird things. I once saw a restaurant review where someone said that they didn't like the restaurant as their child was throwing things at someone else and that person then got very rude and the restaurant staff didn't help. I mean, really? 🤣 I think the people who will really need the book will be found by the book and for them it will be gold. ❤️ Keep shining! Have a wonderful weekend!
Thanks so much for your thoughtful comment, Sadhbh. I agree reviews and ratings and opinions are entirely subjective and so often we don’t even know what’s going on behind the scenes that may have prompted that particular response - it may not actually be about the thing they’re rating or reviewing! 😊
I LOVE your book! Your people will love your book! I had someone email to tell me my content was bewildering and disappointing this week and they were unsubscribing. I cried and got really angry then I apologised and I’m still working it all out.
Oh goodness, that sounds like a lot to deal with. Hope you are OK now.
Thanks Louise I am I’ve turned into into fuel it was such a shock though.
Thank you, Claire, I should have said I was digging for compliments or reassurance! 😘 Criticism is tough, right? Big hugs to you for that gut response. I’m curious, do you think you had done something you needed to apologise for? x
No I don’t think so - I think a lot of that is a taught response. I could tell it was a projection and also mean!
Yep, taught responses run deep. And yep, so often harsh, unjustified judgments aren’t about the thing being judged, or us, it’s about the person doing the judging and what’s going on with them x
Right - so my husband was here when I read the email so he got the full reaction - for the first time I felt anger when I read it - like how dare you write me an email like that and also then shame that I hadn't done enough to help him/ keep him happy - so it's an uplevel but still work to do - this person is a colleague so feels even harder - like what on earth did I do?!/ not do to warrant that but it's not about me is it? People told me the internet was like this which I kind of got prepped for but not from a colleague... I wasn't expecting it to come in via that route...
Oof, that’s an added layer. How we communicate criticism is as important as, and can say more than, the criticism itself. Taking time to process your own reaction and to figure out how (or if) you want to respond is needed x
Yes so wise. I’m working on the let it go part now - I think if he was going to reply he would have by now.
Your honestly here is so wonderful to read, thank you. And thank you for sharing your reaction to the reviews too - it really helped me to understand some of the reactions I feel in my body when I put stuff "out there". Oh...and I left a review too 🩷🩷
Oh you fabulous human, thank you! 😘 Any time I share something that feels a bit vulnerable or doesn’t seem much talked about (I only ever share what I’m happy to) I always know that there will be someone who feels or has felt the same way. Always. But if we don’t talk about the ick feelings we think we’re alone in experiencing them which is just not true. This has been my approach from the very start - I began writing blog posts and created my first course because I was sure there were others out there who struggled the same way I did x
I totally relate to this feeling. I hardly ever read my reviews. Learned it very early on from Seth Godin who also doesn’t read his. You’d never write anything again if you kept reading them. But last year, like you, I noticed on Goodreads when someone broke the chain of five and four-star reviews with a dodge review that showed they basically hadn’t read the book. I initially felt enraged and wounded, and then I remembered why I don’t read reviews. I always remind myself that criticism is just feedback, not a court order to do what the person says or cancel your writing career and not always useful.
Most people don’t know their arse from their elbows when it comes to leaving reviews. Moaning about, for instance, the Amazon delivery driver leaving your parcel on the step or how you got the shits from eating at a restaurant down the road from the hotel when reviewing a book or a hotel only exposes high-level buffoonery.
Thanks so much for sharing your experience and perspective, Nat. Yes to feedback not a court order, and high-level buffoonery will keep me chuckling for a while 😄x
Thank you for putting this out there and being comfortable with feeling vulnerable. It makes others feel less alone. Thank you for a mention of my book. I’m checking yours out now. Stay human. Nx
It's so important and why so many of us write, to say that's me as well, right? And you're welcome, thoroughly enjoying your book x
Thank you for sharing this, Gabrielle! I am waiting for my second book to come out, and today I finally published my post about processing the 1* review that I have received (just one in a sea of 4/5* reviews!). I'm a recovering perfectionist and people pleaser too, and felt very seen in your words here. Thank you for the timely reminder!
Feeling seen, heard, recognising ourselves in others is so valuable, it's why we do this, right? Your second book – what an amazing achievement, Clare, huge congratulations! I do wonder why people bother to write one star reviews, if you don't like the thing why not just move on? They sure do take some processing and I'm celebrating that you have a sea of four and five star reviews! Also, I have my finished Trust the Process embroidery hoop on the wall in my study and I LOVE it x
Yes, absolutely! Thank you so much, Gabrielle - it really came at the right time for me reading your words here, and I'm so grateful to you for sharing. I wonder that too, especially when books are on preorder. If you hate it that much then just get on with your life! Oh that's wonderful, I'm so happy that you love it ❤️ those words definitely keep me going and I hope it bring your strength, joy and inspiration to see it on your wall! xx