From frazzled to calm in one minute
A handy tool for when you're too stressed to think straight
Welcome to The Haven…
…a place where you can take a breath, find comfort and understanding, inspiration and ideas to overcome your overwhelm and move forward with more calm and joy.
Something that I’ve included in my online courses and clients have found helpful is the idea of creating your own Self-soothe Menu. It’s a list of what helps you to bring down the stress and calm your frazzled brain.
The menu is personal to you and it can be divided into how much time each activity takes so that you have a way to care for yourself when you only have five or 15 minutes as well as when you have an hour or even half a day.
Your menu might include suggestions such as go for a walk around the block, have a long drink of water, listen to an episode of your favourite podcast, bake, phone a friend, take five slow deep breaths, journal… It really is whatever helps you to feel calmer, not what works for other people or what you think you ‘should’ do.
The usefulness of a list is that often when you’re in the thick of stress, when your mind has a zillion thoughts zipping round it, when you’re feeling frazzled and tense, when someone’s really pushed your buttons, when you’re feeling overwhelmed, you can’t think of what would help you in that moment.
You know that you need to do something but your mind goes blank and that can even add to your stress because now you’re stressed about not knowing what to do with your stress!
So, in a calmer moment, jotting down a few ideas somewhere that you can easily find (on your phone, your journal, a list on the fridge door…) means that when you’re in that frazzled moment you can pull out your list, pick something from your Self-soothe Menu and do it. And you can add to it any time you think of something new.
I thought I’d help you start your Self-soothe Menu (or add to it if you already have one) by giving you 10 ideas to feel calmer that take only 1 minute. Because sometimes 60 seconds is all we feel we have, right?
Try what sound interesting to you (or all of them) and add whichever ones you like to your menu.
Stand up and shake out your hands, your arms, your legs and feet.
Listen to natural sounds such as birdsong, wind rustling tree branches, lapping waves or a flowing stream, in real time or as a recording.
Take a short breath in and sigh it out. Repeat four more times.
Massage a generous portion of hand cream into your palms, thumbs and fingers.
Shout as loud as you can or scream into a pillow.
With your back to a wall and feet slightly wider than hip width apart, slowly fold over, letting the weight of your head and arms pull you over. Rest there for a few breaths then slowly make your way back to upright.
Place your forefingers on either side of your head, in the slight hollows to the sides of your eyes, and massage gently.
In a standing position lift your arms above your head, take in a deep breath and then exhale loudly while letting your arms flop down to your sides. Repeat four more times.
Take pencil and paper and doodle or draw – what’s in front of you, what comes into your mind… let the pencil take you wherever it wants to go.
Wrap your arms around your torso and give yourself a big hug. With one hand gently stroke your cheek.
Which of these feel good to you?
If you’d like ideas on how to make your own Self-soothing Kit I have a free guide you can get here.
Photo credit: 138843/Pixabay
Quiet the Hive
I had an incredibly enjoyable and energising time chatting with
for her podcast From Inside the Hive (she also writes the Substack ). It was the first time we’d spoken after connecting in ’s Substack community and I think we’ve found kindred spirits!You can hear us talking about making taking care of your wellbeing doable, marginal gains and how we can make use of them, building habits, my journey to a calmer life and so much more in the episode here or on Apple Podcasts.
Did you know you can now message me directly on here?
Read…
Another issue of the fabulous Happy News is out and this time I’ve written on the theme of adventure. One of my favourite features each issue is the Everyday Heroes – to read about ordinary, wonderful people in the words of their loved ones or community is incredibly heart-warming, and tear-inducing.
With so many awful things happening in the world it’s vital we’re reminded of all the good that’s going on too.
(Also love the news story about eating pasta making you happy – knew there was a reason I love Italian food!)
Listen…
Another listen! This time it’s my own podcast and it’s a bit of a different episode because I want to share a message with you for International Women’s Day.
You can listen to episode 140 of Pressing Pause on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or your podcast app of choice and you can also listen (and read the transcript) here.
Until next time,
More for you:
Get your free guides for more calm and joy
Listen to the Pressing Pause podcast
Subscribe to my Substack
Buy my book The 1% Wellness Experiment
How you can work with me:
One-to-one coaching on Zoom
Coach in Your Pocket by messaging app
Take an online course
What a great list of self soothers, thanks for sharing.
I would add:
Sing, hum or whistle
Run your hands through your hair
Love all of these recommendations. Off to find a self-soother to suit me! So enjoyed our conversation and hope others do too! x